In this episode, I sat down with my friend and luxury real estate expert Maile Mock to dive deep into the emotional journey of empty nesting – but with a powerful reframe. Instead of viewing it as an “empty nest,” we explored the concept of becoming “free birds” and embracing this next chapter of life with excitement and possibility.
Maile and I got real about why having our kids leave feels like losing a limb (because it kind of is!) and how the transition evolves from those raw early days of missing them desperately to finding a new rhythm and reconnecting with ourselves. The beauty of my conversation with Maile is that we’re both in it right now!
We also tackled the practical side of empty nesting, particularly around housing decisions and partnerships. Through Maile’s expertise in real estate, we discussed how couples can navigate different visions for their next chapter – whether that’s downsizing, moving to the city, or finding that perfect lock-and-leave property that supports a more adventurous lifestyle.
I loved exploring how we Gen Xers are rewriting the rules of midlife, with most of us viewing this as a time to start new ventures rather than winding down into traditional retirement. The key takeaway? It’s time to give ourselves permission to dream big and explore possibilities we might have put on hold while raising our families. As Maile perfectly summed up – 50 is the new 30, and we have so much life ahead of us to create, grow, and embrace our free bird status.
Key Takeaways:
1. Empty Nesting is Hard – And That’s OK: It feels like losing a limb because our kids have been the center of our universe for 18+ years. The transition happens gradually – from that raw initial separation to finding a new normal. It’s natural for the intensity of missing them to change over time.
2. The Free Bird Mindset is Game-Changing: Instead of focusing on what we’ve lost (empty nest), we can shift to what we’ve gained – freedom to travel, explore new ventures, and design our lives without working around school schedules and kid activities. It’s about embracing possibility rather than dwelling in emptiness.
3. Dream Big But Try Before You Buy: When considering major life changes (like moving to the mountains or the beach), test drive your dreams first. Rent in your target location, experience the lifestyle, and make informed decisions – especially when partners have different visions for the future.
4. 50 is the New 30 – Forget Traditional Retirement: Our generation is rewriting the rules of midlife. We’re healthier, living longer, and just hitting our stride. Instead of winding down, we’re launching new businesses, exploring fresh opportunities, and planning for decades of active, purposeful living.
5. Permission to Put Yourself First: After years of putting everyone else’s needs before our own, this is our time to shine. Whether it’s buying your first home, starting a business, or pursuing a long-held dream – you’re not too old, and it’s not too late to go for what you want.
Maile Says: You’re Not Too F***ing Old! to go for it!
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